问题 问答题

阅读下面习作,按要求进行评点和修改。

理解亲情

  亲情是无形的,它往往存在于父母对你的关爱中,但我们平时并不注意它们,甚至疏忽,讨厌它们,这是不应该的。我们应当正确对待这苦口良药,逆耳忠言般的关爱,怀揣一颗感恩之心,来真正理解亲情。

  上中学之前,我从未真正理解亲情。初一时,因为学校离家远,我只好住校。我原以为可以摆脱父母的唠叨,可以自由得象出笼的的小鸟,但我却忘了有一些事如洗衣服等终究要靠父母。但我还是带着不太丰富的生活经验和大包小包的衣服到了学校。刚开始还好,但越过越糟:学校伙食不好,洗衣服洗得手关节有说不出的酸痛,而且离开了天天见面的父母,心中总有些孤独……到了第四天终于想家了,直等到周末,迫不及待地看到焦急的父母来接我时,才感觉到我们之间的一种可贵的东西,那东西就是亲情。

  现在我不住校了,但这却是一个漫长的冬季,天亮得一天比一天晚。父亲为了能让我早点到校,每天一到六点就悄悄起来——那时天还是黑的,给我做早饭,早饭做好后,他才轻轻叫醒还在睡梦中的我,待我洗漱完毕,吃完早饭后,他才能回到床上再睡一会。有时,我在朦胧中,看见他为我做早饭的身影,一种感动顿时涌向心头:拥有亲情,真幸福!

  也许大家都误解过亲情,认为它很烦,但只要你能理解亲情,不需你回报,父母也就满足了,这正是亲情感人的地方。请仔细留心一下,你会发现,亲情原来如此美好。

  亲情是无形的,发现亲情,我们的心就会变得温暖。

(1)任选一个角度简要评价这篇文章的主要优点。

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(2)文章还有明显的毛病,请指出,并说说你的修改意见。

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答案

(1)成功之处:以小见大,在朴实的叙述中流露出浓浓的亲情,感情比较真挚;叙事有起有伏,有波澜,行文曲折有致;心理描写比较生动,第三段的细节描写也很传神。问题:文章内容并未充分表现理解亲情,题目和文章内容的关系不够紧密;结尾引用冰心的诗句抒情不够自然,也很难揭示文章的主旨。

(2)将题目改为发现亲情或在内容上突出理解亲情的过程;结尾一段换用发现亲情的诗句或删除。

(意思对即可)

完形填空
When I was about 13, my father would take me on short outings on Saturdays.  On the way home, Dad         stopped at the Dairy Queen for lO-cent ice creams.  I couldn't         it, but I could pray from the        we started heading home to that comer where we would either go straight for the ice cream or        and go home empty-handed. That corner         either mouth-watering excitement or      .On one special day, we were heading home, and again I was praying for the      sound of his offer ,It      ,”Would you like an ice cream today?” That sounds great, Dad!” But then he said,” How would you like to     today?”
Twenty cents! My mind reeled(震惊),I could afford it,I got a weekly allowance of 25cents ,plus some      for odd jobs. But     it wsa my  money ,ice cream wasn’t a good use of it ,In a fit of      ,I said ,”well ,in that case,I guess I’ll     ,”My father just said,” Okay, Son,”
But sa we headed home ,I realized how wrong I was and begged him to      .But he just said,” That’s okay ,we don’t really need one.” I felt       for my selfishness and ungratefully see. He didn’t mind, or   act disappointed.
I       that generosity(慷慨) goes two ways and gratefulness sometimes costs more than” thank  you”. On that day gratefulness would have cost 20 cents and it would have been the     ice cream I’d ever had.
I’ll tell you one more thing. We     another trip the next week. As we    the center. I said,” Dad, would you like an ice cream today? My treat.”
小题1:
A.frequentlyB.neverC.hardlyD.strangely
小题2:
A.mentionB.expectC.waitD.get
小题3:
A.monthB.dayC.weekendD.moment
小题4:
A.finishB.driveC.turnD.return
小题5:
A.indicatedB.suggestedC.instructedD.meant
小题6:
A.angerB.shameC.disappointmentD.happiness
小题7:
A.funnyB.surprisingC.interestingD.beautiful
小题8:A.spoke        B,went        C.came           D.flew
小题9:
A.treatB.serveC.buyD.provide
小题10:
A.limitedB.extraC.littleD.easy
小题11:
A.afterB.whileC.althoughD.when
小题12:
A.sadnessB.regretC.curiosityD.selfishness
小题13:
A.passB.acceptC.payD.eat
小题14:
A.keep upB.turn backC.stop byD.give in
小题15:
A.awfulB.unsatisfied C.frightenedD.crazy
小题16:
A.neverB.knewC.evenD.somehow
小题17:
A.lernedB.knewC.acknowledgedD.fund
小题18:
A.dearestB.worstC.cheapestD.best
小题19:
A.made outB.prepared forC.went onD.took up
小题20:
A.crossedB.approachedC.leftD.saw
单项选择题